Useful descriptions of people you deal with every day
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. Got into the gene pool when the lifeguard wasn't watching. A room temperature IQ. Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together. A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus. A photographic memory, but the lens cover is on. Bright as Alaska in December. One-celled organisms outscore him in IQ tests. Donated his body to science - before he was done using it. During evolution his ancestors were in the control group. Fell out of the family tree. Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it. He is so dense, light bends around him. If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you get change back. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. It's hard to believe that he beat out 100,000 other sperm. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he just gargled. Takes him an hour and a half to watch 60 Minutes. Was left on the Tilt-a-Whirl a bit too long as a baby. Wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.
