Kids Say The Darndest Things


How Does a Person Decide Who to Marry?

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming." Allan, age 10

"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with." Kirsten, age 10

Concerning the Proper Age to Get Married

"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then!" Cam, age 10

"No age is good to get married at.... You got to be a fool to get married!" Freddie, age 6


How Can a Stranger Tell if Two People are Married?

"Married people usually look happy to talk to other people." Eddie, age 6

"You might have to guess based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids." Derrick, age 8

What Do You Think Your Mom and Dad Have in Common?

"Both don't want no more kids." Lori, age 8

What Do Most People Do on a Date?

"Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough." Lynnette, age 8

What the Children Would Do on a First Date That Was Turning Sour

"I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns." Craig, age 9

When is It Okay to Kiss Someone?

"When they're rich!" Pam, age 7

"The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that." Curt, age 7

"The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them and have kids with them.... It's the right thing to do." Howard, age 8

The Great Debate: Is It Better to Be Single or Married?

"I don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing ... I'm never going to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed out!" Theodore, age 8

"Single is better ... for the simple reason that I wouldn't want to change no diapers... Of course, if I did get married, I'd figure something out.

I'd just phone my mother and have her come over for some coffee and diaper changing." Kirsten, age 10

What Promises Do a Man and a Woman Make When They Get Married?

"A man and a woman promise to go through sickness and illness and diseases together." Marlon, age 10


How to Make a Marriage Work

"Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck!" Ricky, age 7

"If you want to last with your man, you should wear a lot of sexy clothes.... Especially underwear that is red and maybe has a few diamonds on it." Lori, age 8


Getting Married for a Second Time

"Most men are brainless, so you might have to try more than one to find a live one." Angie L., age 10

How Would the World Be Different if People Didn't Get Married?

"There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?" Kelvin, age 8


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Rated: 2.9 out of 5 Stars / Views: 25,062 / Votes: 6,932 / Shares: 4
 

Submitted on: 15 December 1998 by Buster Love
Joke ID: 985


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